Will I ever get it together?

Today I told my friend Marianne that I'd pick up her daughter from school along with Kaitlyn since I would be driving them along with 2 other 5 year olds to dance. No problem right? So I go about my day doing all of the mom stuff that fills up every day, and as I send Kaitlyn off to kindergarten I think to myself "a nap would be perfect right now" especially since I was yawning every 30 seconds. What do I do? I set my alarm so I will wake up in 1 hour and have plenty of time to shake out the cobwebs before driving down to get the girls. I even put the phone beside me on the bed with the ringer on low in case someone calls (the "mom, I just threw up" calls always seem to come during a nap). Then I curl up on the bed, having been so responsible in making sure that I won't sleep the day away.

The next thing I know, I'm looking at my little alarm clock that I'm holding in my hand for some strange reason and it says it's 2:54 pm. My first thought is that my clock is obviously NOT working because I set the alarm for 1:30 pm and I hadn't heard it yet. That's when it hits me - the alarm is in my hand because I turned it off in my coma like sleep. 2:54 pm? School gets out at 2:50 pm, so I have 2 kindergartners who are either on the bus when they shouldn't be, or they are crying their eyes out wondering why Kaitlyn's mommy didn't show up. This is when I run around the house looking for the phone, mumbling words that I know I shouldn't say (hello! didn't I put the phone right beside me on the bed? Why am I wasting time running around looking for the stinkin phone?).

I finally get a hold of Marianne and the school and explain my complete LACK of responsibility. They help me pick up the pieces like good friends do, and we actually make it to dance on time. Just when I think I might possibly be getting it together - life throws me a curve ball and I'm not even standing in the batter's box. Sigh...maybe someday it'll happen, but that day obviously is not today.

Treadmills are a necessary evil

The time has finally come when I trudge downstairs to my treadmill at 5 am instead of running outside. It saves my lungs from the freezing and often smoggy Salt Lake air, but it sure does come at a cost. One of my favorite things about running is the simplicity of it all. I run to a certain spot, then I turn around and run home. That's pretty much it. When I'm alone I just think my crazy, jumbled up thoughts and sing silently along with my ipod. Lately, I've been lucky enough to run with Maureen, and we get to talk about family, politics, the crazy economy, and anything else that might seem important at the moment.

But on the treadmill it's a different story. There are numbers blaring out at me know matter how hard I try to ignore them. Numbers relating how fast I'm running, how far I've gone, how many calories I've burned, and if I really feel like it, what my heart rate is. And even though Maureen meets me in my basement at 5:10 (I certainly wouldn't get up at that insane hour if I didn't know she would be counting on me to be there) we can't discuss much over the monotonously loud hum of the treadmill. It's kind of like eating fat free icecream - It gets the job done but isn't ANYTHING like the real thing. It's a means to an end, a necessary evil.

We are as the Army of Helaman

Sometimes watching my kids go through the tough lessons of life is a painful thing. Sometimes, friends can be mean, bullies abound, and homework is tough. Sometimes we aren't in the "in" crowd, or we don't feel a part of any crowd. Sometimes we have to do things over and over again, and we still never seem to get them right. With all of the things that seem to shift with the wind in a child's life, I suddenly felt an enormous need to teach my children that some things are constant. No passing fad, shifting view, or changing opinions have an impact on whether or not these things are important.

So we read from the Book of Mormon about the Army of Helaman, yes those 2,000 strippling warriors who fought for the cause of freedom with such strength, bravery and faith that not one of them died in battle. All of the them were wounded mind you, but not one of them died. "How amazing is that" I asked them. They seemed to be quite impressed, but then I told them, "do you know that you can be just like Helaman's Warriors?", which they didn't seem to completely believe. Caleb struck a fabulous fighter pose, and asked, "Can I wear a knife in my sleeve?". I had to explain that this was not the kind of warrior I was talking about. I meant that they could be like "Helaman's Warriors" by surviving life's daily battles with their heads held high. Wounds are inevitable, but our integrity can and should stay intact.

We decided that Helaman's Warriors were true to 3 very important things: their God, themselves, and their family. When it comes right down to it, nothing else matters very much if you don't have those three things.

Just today Caleb came home from school and told me of an experience he had standing up for himself to a bully on the bus. We celebrated with a hug & high five. Way to go my little warrior!

Girls Night Out

It started with yummy Italian food, and then after a crazed search for parking, we were off to the main event. The main event? The Reba & Kelly Clarkson concert at the Energy Solutions Arena. The girls on a night out? Me, my mom, Kami, her friend Tonya, and Kassidy. After a frantic rush to our seats (3rd row dead center I might add) we barely had time to catch our breath before the concert began. I don't remember what they sang first, but man alive, those ladies can sing! And they sang for 2 hours straight, and of course we danced & sang right along with them. That is except for mom who certainly can't stand that long, and Kassidy who fell asleep halfway into the concert. But when she was awake, she did me proud! Dancing and singing along with the best of them. What an amazing, giddy, glorious girls night out!

Just a tad neurotic

For some crazy reason, I have to have a full glass of water beside my bed in order to go to sleep at night. Two-thirds full or even three-fourths full just doesn't cut it. So last night I had my glass of water at my sink as I was brushing my teeth. Mike came over to take medicine for his headache using MY glass of water, and then stood patiently behind me as I finished. I looked at him in the mirror and asked "So, are you just waiting to see if I'll fill it up again?" He laughed and nodded yes, and then I proceeded to fill up my glass of water to the very top. As he turned to go into the bedroom he said, "That's why I love you baby, you are completely comfortable with your neuroticism". Touche' and I just gotta love him back!

5 am comes mighty early

I have a couple of girlfriends that I workout with in the mornings. Now, I'm pretty obsessive when it comes to getting enough sleep, so for the past few weeks I've been thinking about why in the world I roll my hiney (spelling doesn't count on blogs does it?) out of bed at 5 am every morning. I mean, it is pitch black, I'm nearly delirious, and everyone else in my home is still snug in their beds sleeping. I know that I do it because it makes me feel strong and all that...but, I've concluded that if I'm really honest with myself, I do it because it is one of the ONLY things that I do in this life that is just for me. Sometimes I think as we become husbands & wives, moms & dads, employees, employers, and followers of our faith, we can easily forget to spend quality time just on ourselves. Five o'clock in the morning has become that little piece of heaven that I have carved out just for me. As exhausting as it may be, dang it sure feels good!